Once divorce is truly a reality, it is normal to think of the future and have questions. “How will I make enough to be on my own?” Or “How much money will it take to support my spouse and the kids?” Or “What does this new life look like financially?” It is a brand-new world and fear can take over. In my experience, even with the worst of divorces, most couples do want what is best for the entire family.
But what is fair?
There is no such thing as fair. Life is not fair my dear. I am not sure where we started thinking that life was fair or owed us something. No matter what happened in the marriage, each party will have their side of what they think is fair. This is where it gets hard. This is where it gets emotional and irrational at times. But there is a way to divide everything.
What if it were possible for both sides to come together, sit down with a divorce financial planner and simply run numbers to figure out what it takes for everyone to be ok? Try and let go of what one party gets over the other. Just come together to make sure the family will still be okay overall. A mediator can be a good resource as well. The goal of trying to find the overall solution to a win/win for everyone involved.
What truly matters is this chapter of your book is almost over. Focus on the next one and make that one amazing. It is not worth spending too much time, energy, and money on the past. Find your new normal, and I promise it will be worth it!